Why Mother’s Day can be hard for women with tokophobia

Mother’s Day is a happy day for most families. For women with tokophobia, a fear of pregnancy and childbirth, it can bring up difficult feelings.

What is tokophobia?

Tokophobia is an intense fear of pregnancy, childbirth, or both. It can affect women who have never been pregnant, and women who have given birth before (known as secondary tokophobia). It often comes alongside a fear of pain or a fear of death.

Worrying about pregnancy and birth is normal. It becomes a phobia when the fear is overwhelming, causes panic, and starts to shape important decisions.

How it can show up

• Avoiding pregnancy even when you want children
• Using several forms of contraception at once out of worry
• Intense dread about labour and birth
• Feeling guilty or ashamed, especially if a partner wants children

For some women it follows a difficult previous pregnancy or birth. For others it comes from stories they have heard, or a wider fear of medical settings.

If you are pregnant, please tell your midwife or GP how you feel. They can support you and talk through your birth options. You can read more on my tokophobia page.

Want help with a phobia?

Take the free phobia test to see how strong your fear is, or book a £49 consultation call and we can talk it through.